BB- BeautifulBorderline
You deserve a huge appreciation, not sympathy.
As you said, you are fighting for a decade and trying all options to stay above depression. You must have a huge amount of courage and self-belief to try till now.
Yes, humor definitely works; you could probably try watching Didi's, Comedy Show. You might like it.
Hi,
Immense courage you have shown in expressing what you are going through.
You have brought out the interesting aspect of 'humour'. The experience of humour is considered vital in maintaining physical and psychological wellbeing. Humour also has different forms like positive and negative humour. Studies suggest that positive humour plays an important role in emotional regulation, it also instills a feeling of reward and achievement. Positively oriented humour is also beneficial in reducing emotional distress. This includes humour that have praise, appreciation, playfulness and are self enhancing. Using positive humour also helps in strengthening relationships.
Depression does alter the way one perceives emotions. Having said this, I have a few suggestions: Find out what really tickles your funny bones; even if that matches up to 5% of your expectation, keep a note of that. Try finding happiness in small day to day activities like seeing a bird fly with it's family. Humour can be short lived, but content and happiness stay on with us. Try learning something completely new that might interest you and see the joy in that. It is a popular belief that we can seek humour from the memes on the social media, but more often not, it doesn't quite help us.
But most importantly, please continue with your therapy and medication. Hope you find lasting bliss :)